I had a bad burger today, threw half of it out. It was at Blue Moon Burgers, and the problem was too much bad meat.
a) Too much meat. Dear God, who needs that much meat? I thought they were going to be thin little patties, but I was mistaken. Two patties is too much for me now. Four giant pieces of apple smoked bacon would make a great sandwich in itself without two giant patties. Gah. I’m old and grumpy.
b) Bad meat. Flaccid bacon is a buzzkill, especially when it’s thick and expensive looking. I don’t need it to be dry as a cracker, but flaccid is not my thing. Add to that the horror of un-frozen hamburger pucks. As I mentioned above, these patties were large, and cooked to medium. The thing is, when you cook a fresh burger to medium, the red section graduates to the brown of the cooked part. In the patties that I bit into, the “medium” section was a bright red stripe with well defined edges, which says to me that they cooked it from frozen.
Pre-formed frozen hamburger patties are on my list of things I’m done with. Here’s some more items:
- frozen pre-formed hamburger patties
- hot drinks in disposable cups
- single-serving water in plastic bottles
- iodized table salt
- waiting for a table (reason number 1 that Din Tai Fung sucks)
- 小笼包 that’s not scalding hot (reasons 2 through 10 that Din Tai Fung sucks)
- cheapest possible disposable eating utensils
- rancid coffee beans
- high fives
- recieving clothes as a gift; yes, even socks
- people that lecture me about having an opinion
Seriously, for those of you who are going to lecture me about having opinions, I’d like to preemptively tell you to go to hell. In addition, those of you who are going to make a crack about gifting me socks, I have to tell you preemptively that you never. NEVER. had any intention of gifting me socks. It’s amazing to me how predictable people are when they chastise me for having an opinion.
There are other people who appreciate clothes as a gift, I do not. Certainly, certainly, it is worthwhile to gift clothes, especially winter socks for homeless people, I’m 100% behind that, absolutely. However, I will procure my own clothing.
Am I having a bad day? Yes. I heard today that Dave Brubeck has passed away, and though I celebrate what blessings he brought to the world, I’m sad that he’s gone.
I was lucky to see him once at Lincoln Center. I was house sitting out in Forest Hills, and so I couldn’t stay out late, I had to go back and let the dog out. But in the afternoon, I went with Amber up to Lincoln Center, we claimed our seats and camped out for a while. Then an opening act came out that was WAY TOO LONG. Finally Dave Brubeck came out and chuckled to the audience, let’s just do a little Duke Ellington.
I was ENTHRALLED, of course.
So he started playing some Ellington tunes, one after another, taking two choruses, and giving a few choruses to his bandmates. I kept looking at my watch, wondering how late I’d be able to stay before the poor dog exploded from not going out.
The way home was easy enough; I’d take the A train down to Columbus Circle, and then whatever out to Forest Hills. One more hour, I thought. But then I heard the opening notes to A-Train, and I though, dang it, Dave Brubeck is telling me something. “You must take the A-train….”
So I did; I said goodnight and got up and went and took the A-Train, so I could walk the dog. And that was my one and only experience of seeing Dave Brubeck play live. Absolutely I felt lucky. Rest in peace, Dave Brubeck.